How to Support a Loved One with Migraine

If you love someone with chronic migraine, you may wonder how you can support them. Sarah Rathsack offers five tips for migraine education, managing your expectations, and communicating effectively with your loved one. 

It's hard to ask for help. When you live with a chronic condition like migraine, it can be especially tricky. You often feel like a burden, so you don't want to add to the load by asking your friends and loved ones for support.

Learning to ask for help was a big lesson for me. Now that I'm over the hump, I'm grateful to have support when migraine puts me out of action.

If you love someone with chronic migraine or any illness, you may wonder how you can support them. It's not always obvious what your loved one needs, but honest and open communication can go a long way.

Living with migraine for over 30 years, I've learned — and am still learning — how to help my support network to help me. Check out these tips if you're wondering how to support your loved one better.

5 Ways to support your loved one with chronic migraine 

1. Stay flexible and manage your expectations

First, keep an open mind when your loved one/friend tells you what they're going through. Be flexible when plans have to change. If you have plans to go to dinner and your loved one cancels, please don't take it personally.

Making and maintaining friendships can be challenging for migraineurs. Because the disease is unpredictable, it may be tricky to keep to pre-arranged plans. 

Try to stay present in your friend's life and follow up. Show you're there for them while practising healthy boundaries. And understand that, sometimes, your friend may fall short of your expectations - through no fault of their own. 

2. Learn about migraine 

Many people don't understand chronic migraine. I can't count how often people have compared what I'm experiencing to a headache. In reality, migraine is a neurological disease affecting the entire body. Migraine sufferers often feel judged due to these common misperceptions.

Be prepared to listen to and learn what your loved one is going through. Ask what your loved one does daily and what makes it the most difficult. Research it. You'll understand the complexities of the illness, which will help you help your loved one.

Following other people's journeys through blogs or social communities may help. Learning about someone else's experience can provide a helpful perspective. 

3. Try a little tenderness

Remember that you never know what someone is dealing with inside themselves. Show empathy toward what your loved one is going through and offer comfort. Be a source of cheer and support.

4. Pay attention to your loved one’s cues

Picking up on nonverbal cues can support your loved one during a migraine attack.

It's difficult to think and speak when I have a migraine (both before and after an attack). I'm often too exhausted to start the process of asking for or receiving support.

Over the years, my husband has gotten to understand my migraine pretty well and knows missing meals is a massive trigger for me. If I haven't eaten, my body crashes. Once my body starts getting "migraine vibes," deciding what to eat is enough to leave me reeling.

When this happens, my husband cooks or orders non-triggering food and gets me a glass of water. His ability to understand what I need is incredibly helpful.

5. Stick to simple communication when your loved one is going through the stages of an attack

Many times, it's too painful to speak, too painful to move, or too painful to ask for help.

So, please ask straightforward, simple questions: Can I bring you a healthy lunch? Do you need a glass of water? Are the lights too bright? Would you like me to turn them off? Can I babysit your children while you rest? 

Better yet, offer your help immediately if you know what needs doing. Even minor things can make a huge difference. Afterwards, follow up with a text message to show your ongoing support.

Asking for, accepting, and giving help can be difficult for everyone involved. So, the more knowledge and compassion from friends and partners, the better. Love, support, a positive presence, and a proactive approach are some of the best medicines.

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The individual(s) who have written and created the content in and whose images appear in this article have been paid by Teva Pharmaceuticals for their contributions. This content represents the opinions of the contributor and does not necessarily reflect those of Teva Pharmaceuticals. Similarly, Teva Pharmaceuticals does not review, control, influence or endorse any content related to the contributor's websites or social media networks. This content is intended for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered medical advice or recommendations. Consult a qualified medical professional for diagnosis and before beginning or changing any treatment regimen​. 

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Date of preparation: August 2023
D: COB-GB-NP-00180 (V1.0) / T: COB-GB-NP-00220 (V1.0) / M: COB-GB-NP-00200 (V1.0)